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EPISODE #112
TRENDING WITH TIMMERIE: ABORTION AND FERTILITY IN 2020

Fr. Robert Spitzer of the Magis Center joins Trending with Timmerie.  They’ll discuss abortion in 2020 and what is to be expected from the Supreme Court as the battle over Roe v. Wade continues.  Listen in regarding major changes in fertility both domestically and abroad as Japan faces record low birth rates.  What can Catholics do?  Finally they’ll discuss why the public loves Ricky Gervais’ comments from the Golden Globes.

Listen to more episodes at www.RadioTrending.com

Booking Timmerie to speak for a pro-woman and pro-life apologetics training to help have simple conversations about abortion that will foster a strong pro-life position.   https://www.radiotrending.com/booktimmerie

 

 

 

Originally broadcast on 1/11/20

EPISODE #105
TRENDING WITH TIMMERIE: WHY THE “NO” TO BABIES AND MARRIAGE?

Understand the recent arguments for no marriage and no babies. This week on Trending with Timmerie, she’ll discuss current views on marriage and children based on an episode of Middle Ground portraying the viewpoint of mothers verses their adult daughters who have thrown marriage and babies out the door.

Timmerie will discuss a woman in Poland who would have aborted her baby if she knew it had down syndrome. How do you respond to the argument that a baby with special needs should be aborted?

Learn about the money trail that connects abortion advocacy and the Amazon Synod.

 

Listen to more episodes at www.RadioTrending.com

Booking Timmerie to speak in 2020 https://www.radiotrending.com/booktimmerie

 

 

 

Originally broadcast on 10/26/19

EPISODE #100
TRENDING WITH TIMMERIE: AN OVER-SEXUALIZED CULTURE

This is an episode you can’t miss.  We’re talking about it all: STD’s, relationships, abortion, chastity, sex ed programs, contraception, parenting, and much more.

International abstinence educator Pam Stenzel joins Trending with Timmerie to provide the latest information on STDs and to share her story –  her biological father is a rapist.

 

Listen to more episodes at www.RadioTrending.com

 

It’s not too late to book Timmerie to speak this fall for a retreat or educational course on pro-life apologetics or more.  Checkout some of her talks: https://www.radiotrending.com/booktimmerie

 

 

Originally broadcast on 8/24/19

EPISODE #59
TRENDING WITH CHRIS & TIMMERIE: ABORTION AND TECHNOLOGY

Do you feel confident responding to the pro-abortion arguments against Brett Kavanaugh? People are saying women will die. Is there a right to abortion? On Trending with Chris Mueller and Timmerie Millington, your hosts will discuss taking back control of your devices and parenting in the internet age. Do you have a healthy philosophy for connection? They’ll also discuss the fundamental masculine need to provide as they continue their ponderings on “What you need to know about the inner lives of men” by Shaunti Feldhahn. Listen up and send us your tough questions about human life and sexuality. www.RadioTrending.com

 

 

 

Originally broadcast on 9/16/18

EPISODE #47
TRENDING WITH CHRIS & TIMMERIE: PORN PLEASE?

75% of those who say religion is not important view porn as morally acceptable. What’s changed? A new Gallup poll reveals that the majority of Americans think porn is acceptable. On Trending this week, you’ll hear Chris Mueller and Timmerie Millington speak about how to overcome a pornography addiction, how parents can help one teacher’s plea for better discipline of children, and how Hungary’s Family Policy drastically boosted marriages and lowered abortion and divorce rates in just seven years.

 

 

 

 

 

Originally broadcast on 6/17/18

PARENTING IN CYBERSPACE

If your 17-year-old asked you to borrow the car for a few hours, would you let her go if you had no idea where she was heading, who she was going to be with and what she’d be doing? Likely not. Why, then, do well-meaning parents remain completely unaware of where their kids are going, who they connect with and what they’re doing in the digital world?

While 90 percent of teens say their parents trust them to be responsible online, 45 percent say they’d change something about their online behavior if their parents weren’t watching, according to a survey by internet security firm McAfee, Inc. And the Family Online Safety Institute reports that 93 percent of parents say they talk to their teens about online safety, while only 61 percent of teens report having this conversation.

Although the Internet can be a wonderful resource for kids, having access to everything in cyberspace can lead to problems. So it’s essential that parents keep at least some tabs on their children as they navigate through the digital world. How closely they monitor activity depends on their relationship with their kids. It’s a delicate balance between a child’s safety and her privacy.

Fortunately, the principles of Catholic parenting that apply to the “real” world also apply to the virtual one. While understanding the technical ins and outs of the digital universe is essential, the finest monitoring and filtering software programs aren’t as important as some of the basic Catholic parenting principles: love your children, teach them to trust in God, come from a place of empathy and intelligent curiosity, and show them that they’ll always be safe, heard and understood. If this is done on a consistent basis – the earlier, the better – the whole personal privacy-versus-online safety issue will be all but eliminated from the picture.

“Kids naturally want their privacy, and they do need room to grow…but parents should still have password codes. There should be no private activities online,” says Claire Frazier-Yzaguirre, a Catholic marriage and family therapist who, with her husband, Dr. John Yzaguirre, runs Irvine-based Thriving Families.

At the same time, she says, “Parents have to be very interested in their children and learn about digital technology so they can talk with them in an intelligent manner about this subject. Most importantly, you have to balance shared family time [with private digital time]. So many kids feel entitled to hours and hours online. That wouldn’t be the case with good family time balance.”

By using these key parenting principles and creating a healthy amount of family time, arguments such as, “Timmy’s mom doesn’t check his browser history” or “Julie’s parents don’t have her password” become irrelevant. As headstrong as kids can be, when raised right they understand that the online monitoring is done for a good reason.

While you can learn all you need to know about the technical aspects of online safety via one Google search – the amount of helpful information available is extensive – Catholic parents should bookmark Catholic Surf (catholicsurf.com), Faith and Safety (faithandsafety.org), Strong Catholic Family Faith (catholicfamilyfaith.org) and Catholic Web Services (catholicws.com). Check these out, and you’ll be off to a great start.

Still, after all is said and done, kids by nature like to explore and push the boundaries. Frazier-Yzaguirre has an important reminder for when they’re caught: “Don’t shame your kid for experimenting online in an inappropriate manner. Instead, turn their questionable activity into an opportunity to dialog with them. It’s a great opportunity to teach good values. The key is to live the good values yourself, so your kids will learn to own them on their own – don’t force-feed them.”

 

SOMETIMES QUIET TIME IS THE BEST TIME

Your children may need some time out from a frantic calendar of scheduled activities—hopping from advanced academic studies to competitive sports, music classes, debate clubs and other extracurricular challenges—that typically consume the after-school hours of Orange County’s students.

Psychologists and others who work with students in elementary school through high school observe with alarm the anxiety exhibited by youngsters who thirst for more of the self-directed play and hours for reflection that were typical of childhood a generation ago.

“Today there are a lot of busy working parents and they want their children also to be busy and fulfilled. We support them. But sometimes children get so busy they don’t have time to explore more of their own interests and to seek spirituality and quietness,” says Sally Todd, Associate Superintendent of Schools for the Diocese of Orange.

“As adults, we need downtime. And so do children,” Todd says.

How much programmed activity is too much depends on the child. “Some of our greatest philosophers were very quiet and meditative,” Todd observes. It is the parents’ responsibility to know their children’s individual talents and needs, such as perhaps time to work alone on a hobby or read for pleasure or set up a lemonade stand or just play tag with friends.

A 2007 report by the American Academy of American Pediatrics found that time for free play has been markedly reduced because of factors that include a hurried lifestyle and “carefully marketed messages” to parents who feel obligated to give their children as many organized enrichment opportunities as possible, generally in the belief that a high-octane resume will wow admissions officers at top-notch colleges.

“Although most highly scheduled children are thriving,” the report says, “some are reacting to the associated pressures with anxiety and other signs of increased stress.”

For all children, the report recommended some balance of free play to develop “their imagination, dexterity and physical, cognitive and emotional strength.”

Kathleen Montemagni, a neuropsychologist and Executive Director of Learning Services at Mater Dei High School in Santa Ana, says because of all the scheduled after-school activities the majority of students get home at 8:30 at night and then have dinner and plenty of homework, which she figures puts them in bed about midnight.

“They are not getting enough sleep, which is a big deal, especially with teenagers,” Montemagni says, making them unable to focus well in class. Parents often don’t notice their children are overstressed until their grades suddenly plunge, she says.

Parents sometimes learn the extent of their children’s distress the morning they refuse to go to school, says Kristina Bielkevicius, the school psychologist at Serra Catholic School, a K-8 school in Rancho Santa Margarita. “Kids don’t always communicate with their parents that they are overwhelmed,” Bielkevicius says.

Bielkevicius sees students starting in about fifth grade who have symptoms of stress and anxiety stemming from too many activities. She advises them to pick one extracurricular activity each semester that they will enjoy and ditch the others.

Parenting also can prosper when children spend more time at home, says Rick Capaldi, Executive Director of Outreach Concern, a nonprofit agency that supplies counselors to 150 Southern California schools. “Sometimes the most beneficial thing for these kids is just having some good mom and dad time—time where they are sitting down and having dinner together or taking a walk,” Capaldi says.

The American Academy of Pediatrics report observed that although no one can be sure what academic skills children will need in tomorrow’s world, they will become more resilient adults by spending time with parents to learn character traits like honesty, generosity, decency, tenacity and compassion.

THE REAL PRIZE OF THE RACE IS LIFE EVERLASTING

Sports fans can be a rough and tumble group: shouting at players, arguing among themselves and fans from the other team, and sometimes it gets ugly. Emotions run hot for people who are dedicated to various professional sports teams. Even the Chicago Cubs have die-hard fans who are waiting for their chance to win the World Series since they last won it in 1908.

It’s difficult to maintain some kind of equilibrium on the sidelines when so much is at stake in a game. Put into proper perspective, that sounds, let’s say, “unrealistic,” to be charitable (or maybe “a little crazy” is better).

However, put into the context of parents as “fans” on the sidelines of their children’s sports, it becomes unbelievably clear that everyone should be reminded these children are playing a game.

I’ve seen parents so emotionally charged at the end of whatever game their children are playing that they take their outrage to the parking lot and sometimes embarrass not only themselves but also their children as well.

Shame on us as parents if we can’t find a way to cheer on a good player, no matter whether he/she is on our team or the opposing team. Healthy competition can be good, but once it travels beyond that, the coach should rein in the players; but the job of pulling parents back from the brink is murkier.

We all need to review our levels of enthusiasm for our children’s sports, especially if this is not his or her gift. Stop, take a deep breath and say a silent prayer before settling down to watch a game.

Often, school teams pray before games as a group, inviting spectators and players to join in the same prayer, not one in each camp trying to talk God into being on their side. They shake hands before the game and then again after it concludes.

If we want our children to grow up respecting the rights of others, we have to take our outrage out of the game, away from the sports venues and introduce tolerance, civility and concern for everyone. It can happen; I’ve seen it, not often, but it does exist.
When enrolling children in school, it’s also time to reflect and pray about the best possible place for our children, a place that is safe and nurturing, with values and beliefs we hold dear.

For instance, some parents who enroll their children in small Catholic schools consider moving them to larger schools around fifth or sixth grade, not because of problems with teaching or learning but because sports teams begin to take on real meaning.
Idealistically or irrationally, some parents believe their children will be the next professional basketball, baseball or lacrosse players and should go to bigger schools with purportedly better teams. Those parents need to think about their children, not their visions of fame and fortune in the world of sports.

When my 5-foot-10 daughter was in high school, I saw a basketball scholarship in my future. Didn’t happen. She was not a highly motivated and rabidly competitive player. I settled for academic scholarships instead.

I also had less than complimentary thoughts about a coach who didn’t play her enough during a game. We all want what’s best for our children, and sometimes we become so wrapped up in our idea of what’s right, we’ve lost track of our children, their needs and capabilities versus our expectations and demands. I let it go, and we all moved on.

St. Paul exhorted the Corinthians: “Do you not know that runners in the stadium all run in the race, but only one wins the prize? Run so as to win” (1 Cor 9:24).

But he was talking about winning everlasting life rather than a transient prize won for a particular race. Our “race” takes a lifetime of faith and practice so that we can win the real prize of everlasting life.

Liz Quirin is editor of The Messenger, the newspaper of the Diocese of Belleville, Ill.